


Love Lies

by GlitchNote



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Hurt No Comfort, Light Angst, Season/Series 04, always a girl!Dean, fem!dean, mentions of Sam - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 03:02:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12003624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GlitchNote/pseuds/GlitchNote
Summary: Guess not even love was enough to save the day.





	Love Lies

**Author's Note:**

> I'm imagining this takes place in season 4, but that might be horribly inconsistent. A drabble formed from a speculation of what could have happened had Dean been born Deana. (And please tell me if I've tagged incorrectly, I tried my best to do right.)

Castiel steps in close and frames her face in his palms.  It should be ridiculous - but it's not.  It's warm, and safe, and _reverent._ His thumbs stroke her hairline.

“Deana Winchester,” he says, quiet.  “One day, someone will appreciate and love you for all that you are, as you deserve and are meant to be.”

She gulps.  It's supposed to be romantic and poetic, but all she hears is the rejection it is.  Furious and _now_ feeling ridiculous and - God, she doesn't want - _hurt,_ she's hurt - she pushes his hands away and takes a step back.  “So that's it then?” she announces ironically.  “Getting dumped by an angel?  Ouch.”  And her voice sounds pathetic even to her own ears.

His eyes are sad.  “We were not built that way,” he replies.  “I'm afraid I could not give you what you deserve.  And you are worth so much.”

“ _Gah_.  Save it,” she bites.  Turning away so he doesn't see the tears in her eyes, she continues, “It's not you, it's me.  Same in every species.  I get it, asking you to fall and give up everything for a meager, painful life on Earth?  Doesn't even measure up.  Can it about worth, buddy.  I'm not much to fall for anyway.”

A gentle hand brushes her shoulder.  She turns her head away, but he steps up behind her into her line of sight, head bowed so it almost touches hers.  “I love you,” he murmurs.  “But _that_ is not worth much.”

She sniffs and her eyes burn.  Reverent, Castiel presses his lips to her forehead, but she turns away and out of it, jaw tense.  His warm presence surrounds her for a moment more before he withdraws, hands lingering, footfalls quiet.  The sound of rustling feathers announces his departure.  Stunned, Deana looks over her shoulder at the empty room, the silence and darkness left behind, and feels her chest break open.

Sam’s gone, probably off with his demon bitch who’s more than happy to requite his _feelings_.  The jerk had better luck in his love life, and his ex was murdered by their preternatural nemesis.  She’s just been jilted, dumped and rejected, by her angel, whom she’s worked with and fought for so hard to convince, protect, and rely on.  Everything she’s dealt with and took head on, she thought she finally got a break, got something nice for herself in this for-the-dogs life.

Guess not even love was enough to save the day.  Bruised and aching, and feeling unimaginably lonely, Deana closes her eyes on her welling sob, and drops her head into her hands.


End file.
